I woke up this morning at 3am, turned and noticed that my husband was not lying next to me and I wondered where he had gone...
He was in the living room sleeping on the couch comforting our dogs because he had not allowed them to sleep in our room last night because I was having a hard time getting comfortable. He snuck back in our room and told me not to worry because they were all resting well. (ever since my surgery and chemo my dogs go "everywhere" with me; imagine if you will me and all 3 of the dogs in our hallway half bath:-)
I dosed off and woke again at 4am, turned and saw that he was sleeping and snoring soudly. My mind started clicking and before I knew it, I was thinking of things that I know that I should not allow myself to ponder...
Who would spoil my grandsons? (Who else could they text and say "how's chemo? please send contacts!) Would anyone else in their right mind send printer paper, wite-out (i didn't even know they sold wite-out anymore) and pencils overnight, so that they could focus on their big school project?)
Who would tell all "those" stories at Holiday gatherings?
The one where our ski boat engine failed and my husband paddled us into shore, while the rest of us laughed at our situation and ate cookies and drank sodas.
Or that one time years ago before 9/11 when I was flying to see customers and had forgotten something and my husband drove like a madman, got what I needed and convinced the gate agent to let him bring it to me on the plane, just before it took off.
Or when he surprised me with our Las Vegas "quicky wedding" and flew in my daughter and grandsons.
Or when he flew to and drove all over northern, CA, found my adult severly bi-polar daughter living on the street and flew her back to NY so that we could get her into the best mental health facility?
Or when he told me he would face and fight this crazy disease with me every step of the way... - his voice was the first voice that talked to me in the recovery room
- he slept by me every night during my 8 day hospital stay
- he has gone to every Dr appointment
- he has gone to every chemo session
- he does everything around the house
- he says that my only job is to focus on myself and get better
- and he still chases me around the house and tells me I'm sexy
At 4:30am, I turned and woke him up... I said I was scared and needed him. He turned, snuggled me and we talked, laughed, cried and shared our fears and dreams. And again, he reminded me that I was sexy:-) He told me that it made him happy just to lie beside me and that I could never really comprehend just how much he loves me.
He also reminded me that he would always be there to do the things I couldn't and yes, he would even send wite-out overnight to our 15 year old grandsons.
Thank you sweet ladies for letting me share and brag about this incredible man I'm married to
Prayers, hugs and lots of love - Cathy Â
Reposted with permission from Inspire.com-Ovarian Cancer National Alliance